February 2012
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Impression of a Nice Guy
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January 2012
14 posts
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Library Prayer
Lord, Please help me not strangle the woman on the computer who has been in now twice and keeps asking me question after question and doesn’t know how to fill out an online form and no matter how many times I try to help her she keeps f#cking everything up and repeating each question she is answering out loud and I’m not even sure what she is trying to accomplish but if her goal was to...
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The Foundling
Paige : What’s a Foundling?
Me : It’s a child, that’s been abandoned, that has been found….
Rick : It’s a Chinese kid that was lost…..”I found Ling!” (said in a goofy voice..)
Me & Paige : …….
Rick is crying because he’s laughing so hard…
He’s an idiot, but I love him…
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Honesty At The Mall!??!!
Rick, Paige and I went to the mall last night. We met Gillian, Hesthr & Sean there. All the girls were looking for dresses for a dance that’s coming up. They must have tried on at least 6 a piece. Dresses were found, dresses were paid for..We went to the food court to eat. Mall was closing. We drove home in two separate cars.
We get home and my phone rings…
Hesthr : Is...
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December 2011
7 posts
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itsafilthygoddamnedhorrorshow asked: Do you want me to include the link to your shop on my pictures? I'm sorry that I didn't I knew they were from cafepress but I didn't buy them for myself so I wasn't sure where exactly. Sorry about that! But it's a wonderful design and I really love them! Aha, :)
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My American Horror Story Store =] →
I designed stuff just to have gifts for my daughters…And stuff is flying off the shelves!! LOL
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November 2011
9 posts
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Honesty on Black Friday
I work behind the front desk in a public library. I just had a patron hand me an envelope that she found on our scrap paper pile. It was a bank envelope containing 4 $50 bills…I thanked her for being so honest. A woman had just been in with her son. She had been a bit frazzled looking for her library card and we had been discussing her son. He has special needs and has just recently started...
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Penelope & My Madison Handbag
My daughter Paige had basketball practice early this morning. She needed to be at the school at 8:45am. I didn’t want to have to crate Penelope, our vizsla, twice today so I figured she could go along for the ride.
I’m standing at the top of our stairs, I bend down to get my Madison Handbag and say, “C’mon Nell, let’s go!” Before I realize what is happening,...
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Mix-Master Me!!
I walk into my living room with a drink in my hand. The drink was orange on the bottom changing to red towards the top…
Paige : What is that drink you’re drinking?!? (said in a smarmy accent)
Me : Juice.
Paige : Is there alcohol in it?
Me : No.
Paige : What’s in it??
Me : Orange juice and cranberry juice.
Paige : Why is the color like...
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Why we can't bring Rick to the movies anymore!
Ok. We just got back from seeing “In Time” with Justin Timberlake.
For anyone that doesn’t know the premise…It’s set in the future, people don’t physically get any older than 25. At age 25 they have a timer, on their arm, that counts down a year. Their currency is time. Workers get their wages in time added to their counter. Anything you buy is deducted from...
October 2011
15 posts
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Condoms & Oreos
I walked over to the little market that’s right next to the library I work at. They sell all sorts of stuff at the front counter. Candy, cookies, random stuff. I’m standing in line behind two men, waiting to pay for my tea, cold medicine & rock candy swizzle stick. I notice something funny…
Me : Hey Hakam! Is there a big call for Oreos & condoms?
Hakam :...
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Gillian the Sleepwalker/talker
Last night. A little after twelve. Gillian had fallen asleep on the couch. I wake her up and tell her to go to bed. She walks down the hall and stops by the open bathroom door. Standing in the darkened doorway, looking at the light-switch, she says…
Gillian : Can you help me open the window? I need help. I can’t open the window….
I walk over and flip on the light-switch
...
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Eric & The Cat House
Lisa, my co-worker at the library, has been telling me about a great project her husband Eric has been working on. Their cat, Scamp, is an outdoor cat and was in need of a shelter. Eric looked around for a nice cat house to buy and thought maybe he could just make one. Lisa suggested making it a family project. Everyone had a hand in making Scamp a beautiful home. Lisa and Eric were thinking,...